As I child, my self-esteem was based off feedback. I felt like my family never really congratulated me in anything. Every time I got a good grade, my mom never really cared. No one said anything, but when I got bad grades all of the sudden I’m the worst person in the world. What’s the point in doing good when no one acknowledges it? Well that’s what I thought back then. I had a talk with my uncle in my downfall in high school where my grades were flooded with Ds and Fs asking him;

Me: What’s the point? I don’t get it. All my friends get rewarded like $20 per A, but whenever I get an A I just saved myself from being yelled at. I just don’t find a point to do good.

Uncle: Well, in our family we don’t spoil you guys with money or things you want. You got to earn everything by yourself, and motivate yourself to do good even when people don’t see it. Your work reflects your future, how is it helping us? It’s only going to help you. Plus we’re preparing you for the real world, we can’t always baby you.

That’s when I started pulling up my grades and just focusing on myself instead of people’s satisfaction. More of the reason why I dislike when people are flashing their money or expensive bags they get because I never got any of that freely. It was always earned for, and I thought it was a valuable lesson. If I ever do decide to have kids, I’m not gonna spoil them for shit. It was a struggle, but it was worth it.